You guys, I really don't like my life right now.

And I'm not even trying to be emo.

There's just too much shit going on.

My mom got a letter from a-tech today saying that I'm failing World Literature and might not graduate.

And, you know what, I get A's and B's on all my papers in that class. The only reason I'm failing is because I don't "participate in discussion."

I don't really see UNR happening anymore. Because I don't really see the Millennium Scholarship happening anymore. Because I'm a fucking idiot.

So, I'll probably be stuck here. With all this shit that I hate.

I keep having these dreams about my grandma. And they're not really good ones. In most of them, she dies. Over and over.

I hate my job. I used to love working at Target. The time there goes so slow now. And I don't even care if I get paid or not.

My life isn't going to be what I thought it would be.

I wanted, hell, I practically needed to get away and go to UNR. Get away from this old fucking life. That's never going to happen. Because I'm too fucking dumb.

I know some people at a-tech who are getting full rides to Stanford or other colleges like that. Why do I have to be the dumb one of the bunch?

Why does everything have to fall apart all at once..